My Dad came from a family with a strong Catholic background and my Mom was very involved in the Church of England when she was young. Yet, both had been completely put off by bad experiences in their churches and so did not seek to raise my brother and I with any firm religious belief.

Though I wasn’t encouraged to actively believe in God, as I grew I became aware of an inner desire to go to some kind of church to find out if God is real. I never actually pursued this desire until my early twenties. By this stage I was struggling. On the outside everything seemed fine and I was quite successful in my various endeavors. But, on the inside I was falling apart. I put on a brave face. I felt like a “fish out of water” in life and I yearned to find where I belonged. There were also so many questions about life and death for which there seemed to be no clear answers. Death and not existing anymore absolutely terrified me. It seemed that the more I strove by my own effort in life to be settled, the more I fell apart within (although no one truly knew).

I thought that going to church would help me and I even underwent confirmation in the Wesleyan Methodist Church. But as often as I went on Sunday, I still felt the same again by the time Monday rolled around. There was no reason for me to question the preaching and everyone was so nice, but the Sunday experience was always very empty and one dimentional. No one gave me any clear direction, so I assumed being a Christian simply meant choosing to believe in God and the Bible and trying to be a good person. It all seemed very vague and kind of fake.

Then, a lady I worked with told me about someone she had met who had invited her to a fellowship supper. She told me how impressed she was with the genuine joy and peace of the people there. These were two things I greatly desired in my own life, so she offered me a business card she’d been given by the host. To my surprise, when I spoke to him on the phone he told me about real, personal, tangible miracles that had happened in his life and others’ lives and that I could experience the same.

Although I was excited, I was also suspicious and afraid of getting caught up in a cult. But, the desire to check it out never left me and finally, after three months, I attended one of his group’s meetings. The moment I walked through the door I felt like I’d come home; it felt warm and caring and real. The operation of the spiritual gifts at the end of the meeting (which was the first time I’d ever heard speaking in tongues) was particularly powerful – so much so that I was moved to tears.

The most exciting time came when the man I’d spoken to on the phone offered to show me a bunch of scriptures. It was such a relief to read for myself what God clearly expected from me and to learn about the abundance He offered in return. I was shown that even though I considered myself to be a Christian (because I’d been to a couple of different churches for a time), God still wanted me to be baptized by full immersion in water and anointed by Him with the power of His Holy Spirit (Acts 2:38, Romans 8:9). That is, God wanted me to be empowered to live a Christ-led life.

Inspired by what I saw in Scripture, I asked how I could receive the Holy Spirit anointing. I was invited to pray with the man and another lady and I eagerly accepted. I was a little nervous and on the outside things felt uncomfortable because it was all new and different from the church “norm,” but on the inside everything felt so right as if I was following the path to truth. I had never even actually prayed to God up until this point because I didn’t know if He was real, and I didn’t really know what to say. So, in a peaceful room with two strangers I called out to God (“wherever He was”) to fill me with His Holy Spirit (“whatever that was”).

My whole world transformed after a few minutes when I heard myself begin to pray in a brand new language. It wasn’t “gibberish”; it was a pure, complex, beautiful language. At the same time, I felt the aching “hole” in my heart close up and a dark heaviness lift from me. I felt complete. Instantly, somehow, I knew God intimately. Suddenly I had an inner understanding of life and I was no longer terrified of death at all. I knew beyond doubt that I’d been anointed with God’s Holy Spirit and miraculously changed.

On my drive home, I pulled into the empty parking lot of some kind of office building. I wondered if I could pray in the spiritual language again, so I parked the car and tried. I was so excited and in awe that the language easily flowed from within and out my mouth as I just spoke out in faith, allowing the Holy Spirit within me to communicate with God. I remember thinking again, “Wow, wow, wow….God is real…He is really really real…And I now know the Bible is true, too, because what was written in there, that I was shown today, actually happened to me!”

Over the next three days, I read the entire New Testament. I was so keen to get to know God and Jesus and what He had to say to me. In the past, the very little of the Bible that I had read seemed like some strange fiction book, but this time it felt like God was writing to me personally. I got water baptized at the very next meeting in obedience to what God says in His Word. I learned that baptism equated to burying my old life and committing to a new, better way under Him. I was so excited and eager get it done as soon as possible because it was part of sealing my relationship with my Father and coming fully under His wing.

That was many years ago now and I can truly say that the more I’ve sought to diligently apply God’s Word in each area of my life, the more I’ve experienced God’s blessings. I’ve experienced many miracles and the exceeding abundant provision of the Lord, including being immediately healed from a massive, intensely painful lump in my left breast just as I was about to undergo a mammogram exam. It simply dissolved right there as I sat in the chair and prayed in tongues together with my husband in Jesus’ name (while the technician left the examination room for a few minutes). I still went through with the exam because I wanted to prove to the doctor that I’d been healed. When I entered his office, he simply looked up at the x-rays on the wall and said, “Why are you here? There’s nothing there…!”

It’s so incredibly comforting to wake up every morning knowing – and feeling – I have a personal relationship with the real, living God when once I seriously wondered if He existed. And, I can happily say that my life has gone from strength to strength as I’ve learned to exercise my faith in God’s Word, even outwardly proclaiming His promises when my natural man has tempted me to doubt or fear.

I’ve learned to dig into the Bible to find scriptures that relate to every situation in my life and then apply these no matter what my mind or heart might be tempting me to believe or follow. God’s way has never failed me. It has always proven to produce the best results. Three of the keys have been 1) always giving thanks in all things as I wait patiently for God’s hand to work, 2) never allowing myself to have a bad attitude toward God, but humbly realizing that all things are a product of my choices for or against Him and His will, and 3) praying in tongues as much as I can every day – both dedicated worship times and also praying casually (but absolutely sincerely, of course) as I go about my day (not in public situations, though!).

I know praying often in the spiritual language God has given me kind of activates the Holy Spirit within me; it helps me to “tune in” to the Holy Spirit (versus being led astray by my own self) and access His power. In fact, I realized early on in my walk with God that having the Holy Spirit is like being granted a free membership to the ultimate fitness center. If I continue to use what has been made available to me then I’m bound to get stronger and healthier. Yes, it requires effort, but it’s sooooo worth it! The rewards not only affect my own life, but they have a major ripple effect as they flow on to others around me from my husband and children to even far beyond. And, seeing my words and actions touch others’ lives in a positive way toward God is the biggest joy I get out of this life on earth!